LUNCH PASSING LOVE: Elderly people have lunch at Caojiaxiang Community in the city of Weifang in east China's Shandong Province on September 20. The community provides lunch for 80 aging residents who do not live with their children (XINHUA)

Passing-Love Hotline, a private workshop, occupies merely a few dozen square meters in Beijing. It has helped nearly 10,000 people nationwide over the last six years by providing psychological counseling over the telephone.

"Many widows or widowers will develop suicidal tendencies within a year and a half of losing a spouse," said Xu Kun, founder of the hotline. "They are prone to depression," Xu said.

In 2005, one of her colleagues felt gloomy and often mentioned suicide after his wife died. Xu called him many times to comfort him, leading her colleague to get rid of depression and suicidal ideas. This event prompted her to notice elderly people, and she learned that widows or widowers would have 18 months of psychological crises, when they would be emotionally fragile and prone to suicide.

Sponsored by China Aging Development Foundation, Xu Kuan, once a philosophy teacher at Capital University of Economics and Business, established the non-profit hotline workshop in 2006.

The workshop has attracted some experts and scholars on psychology, sociology, philosophy and humanities, offering consultative service and other measures to improve the psychological conditions of elderly people undergoing crises of mental health.

Apart from offering a free hotline for psychological consultation, the workshop conducted telephone call-back services and accompanied aging people with volunteers in June this year.

Many elderly people who don't live with their children are lonely. According to Xu, the workshop plans to organize some more activities to help these aging people escape the shadow of loneliness, and to offer psychological consultation and crisis management.

"Many elderly people do not have other difficulties to deal with and are merely so lonely that they just want to be talked with," said Xu. Several dozen calls would be received every day by the staff at the hotline, who work in an office with simple furniture. Some elderly people talk for one or two hours, so the line is sometimes busy.

Aunty Wang, over 60 years old, is a typical client of the workshop. Her husband died not long after her retirement, and crushed her dreams of accompanying her husband to enjoy their golden years by visiting parks and raising birds. Living alone in a large house, she invited her son and daughter-in-law to live with her. But the young couple is too busy, going to work early and coming home late, leaving Wang alone nonetheless.

She expected to have a grandchild to enjoy family happiness. But the young couple said they are too busy to have a child. Seeing neighbors holding grandchildren in their arms, she felt sad, and preferred to stay at home except for visits to the produce store.

Having called the workshop several times, Wang became a friend of the staff there. Only simple greetings and chats have improved her mood.

Answering the call

"Psychologically, a person would send out a 'call for help' to people around them before making a suicidal decision. Answering the call, even a 15-minute talk, could save a life," said Xu.

Xu later found that mere telephone communication is far from enough to aid the elderly. She then launched a friend-making platform for aging people, including afternoon tea and traveling. These activities even attracted aging people from suburban areas such as Fangshan, Miyuan and Huairou in Beijing, and those from Tianjin Municipality.

Aging people are usually psychologically supported by their role in society, family relations, and physical health. Before retirement, they have good health, happy family, and a social job. These three pillars will collapse after retirement, after which they do not play a clear role in society, are not as healthy as before, and may have problems in their families.

Among her clients, Xu found women accounted for 80 percent among widowed elderly, so there is quite a large number of aging women having difficulties making friends, and the phenomenon becomes worse as they grow older.

To resolve psychological crises of this part of widows, Xu established a national hotline serving elderly women who do not live with their children. The office staff listens to aging visitors' worries and difficulties, suggests possible resolutions, and keep records on all cases.

Xu is also preparing to set up a database of elderly people. "The elderly people who need help might not know of the hotline, and we have no idea where these aging people are. When we complete the database, we will be able to take initiative to serve them," said Xu.

The number of Chinese people who are over 60 years old reached 167 million in 2009, accounting for 12.5 percent of the total population, and will hit 450 million by 2050, accounting for 33 percent of the total, according to the statistics from the Ministry of Civil Affairs.

(Source: thefirst.cn)